Have you ever just popped open a jar of processed "hot" fudge and started to scoop it directly from jar to mouth? Um...yea. Me neither (rolls eyes).
So, this pretend diet, not really diet, since I refuse to admit to ever actually being on a "diet" (it sounds just too effing terrible) has been driving me a little nutter. I honestly, have no need to lose weight. I just wanted to be slim for my Halloween costume. I was curious to see if I gave up most dairy, alcohol, and a lot of gluten to see if it would alter this.
One-this was a stupid idea to do in September and October. These are the last two months I will still feel motivated to seek out, fellow human contact. Once November hits, I will likely start to retreat into solitude hibernation and will be elbow deep in dark art projects and paintings. What comes with fellow human contact? Celebration in liquid form. And most often, than not...alcohol is in said liquids.
Son of a bitch.
Non-Diet (diet) destroyed!
I was pretty good for a couple weeks. No alcohol, I was juicing every morning and had upped my run/walk work out to 6-7 miles a day.
Dairy was at an all time low and I could tell I have significantly slimmed down. I was (as of last weekend) down 7 lbs. However, my skin was (and still is) wreaking major havoc. You'd think it would be clearer than it's ever been. Not the case. It's probably the worst, it's ever been. Oddly, a lot of publications I was reading said this was normal when making major diet changes. That it's the toxins coming out of your skin. I'm not so sure of this. And I honestly, blame all the sugars (although natural) in the juicing I was doing. Or I'm dying. So, there's that.
So, a few glasses of wine have been had (damn you, delicious Sauvignon Blanc from New Zealand!).
I have eaten some cheese (not a lot though) and haven't been juicing every morning. But! I am still watching it very consciously. Just until Halloween. I started craving the oddest things when I cut back and I don't like how that made me feel. Almost out of control, since I'd been denying myself relatively simple pleasures. My life is pretty simple already. Can't deny EVERYTHING! Might as well cut myself off from the world and plop myself in front of my TV every night after work in quiet, sad (very, very sad) solitude. Maybe start watching the evening news too. Fuck no! Sad little fucks.
With the conscious diet changes, I have been thinking about more ways to keep dairy off the menu. Don't get me wrong...I LOVE CHEESE. Repeat, I LOVE CHEESE. I have The Feels for it, in the deepest depths of my soul. But, I know that it is the root of most of my problems. I never feel great after I eat a heavy dairy meal and most times can actually smell it coming out of my skin. GROSS! The more I cut back, the more I notice when I do consume it. And number one reason I should avoid it...I definitely look bloated after consuming it. Exactly what I'm attempting to avoid. What a sexy blog post this is today (rubs belly)!
Anyway...any time I have limited ingredients or limiting ingredients, I start to get all creative and shit. So, I came up with this little gem.
Thin Mint VEGAN Ice Cream. Girl Scout cookies that are vegan? It's true...the Thin Mints are vegan. Also, it is not made with real Girl Scouts (Addam's Family reference).
Vintage Girl Scout Badges I bought last weekend
Disclaimer, the whipped cream and fudge DO have dairy, but the ice cream is TOTALLY Vegan. Moderation, my lovelies. Moderation (blows kisses)!
Serves: 4 Almost Vegan Girl Scouts
4 Cups Chopped Frozen Bananas
2/3 Cup Almond Milk
1 Sleeve Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies
1/2 tsp. Peppermint Flavor Extract
2 TBS Coco Powder
1/2 tsp. Vanilla Extract
Whipped Cream (or whip up coconut milk cream to be totally vegan)
In a food processor, add frozen bananas and cookies. Blend. Add remaining ingredients. Blend well. Pour into a loaf pan and refreeze. I refroze overnight, but you could probably get away with a couple hours. Let loaf pan sit out 15-20 mins. or so (depends how warm your home is) and scoop. No ice cream maker required! Those are just too fancy (and expensive), which I totally don't have time for right now. Top with hot fudge, whipped cream, cherry and crushed pistachios.
Eat your little heart out!